Darwin had a job interview lined up for later that same day. I felt like I was betraying my past self who had made a promise to future me that the next time would be the last time." I stayed because I was financially dependent on him and he had been effective in his campaign of humiliation to the point that I had very little self-esteem left. Why had I stayed? Why did I take some sick pride in tolerating abuse? As a sociologist of gender, the parallels between this dynamic and domestic abuse were very clear to me. "I had promised myself that if he did this one more time, I'd walk out the door. Darwin said.īut after the meeting, she hated herself for staying. I considered rage-quitting on the spot, but decided to try to breathe through it and mute the rest of the meeting," Dr. (I had been slacking with my coworkers for months about how out of line he was with me). "He was so disrespectful and egregious that a coworker actually spoke up in my defense, telling him that it was unacceptable to talk to me that way. He was very clear that we had to have our cameras on and had to sit still."īy this point, other staff members couldn't take it anymore too. I then switched over to my exercise bike and tried to hold my head as still as possible and he called me after the meeting to tell me it was inappropriate. During my second meeting, I hopped on my treadmill, figuring that walking desks had become an established thing during the pandemic, but he complained that it made him dizzy. But he liked them, so we had to sit through them. "Everyone complained about these meetings and how much time they wasted. "We had an hour-long check-in each morning and another hour-long check-in at the end of the day, amounting to 10/40 hours per week in check-ins that could have been completed so much more effectively through individual check-in emails to him," she continued. I was shocked that he would treat an employee this way, especially one who had only been there for three weeks. He refused to give me instructions, but everything I did was somehow wrong, and by my third week he began publicly humiliating and berating me during company-wide zoom calls. "I assumed that as the expert on that specialty I would be treated with some measure of respect and have some autonomy, but that was not the case. I had been hired to perform a brand new role that my boss neither understood nor respected," Dr. "I realized fairly quickly that I was in a bad situation at my job. We can sit and discuss numbers all we want, but it's often the human factor that allows us to grasp social dynamics, and Helena's story perfectly encapsulates it. Darwin and she was kind enough to speak to us about the origin of her tweet.
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